How blogging has change me

Social media has allowed me to express myself more than I ever thought imaginable. I am not a very open person and I do not like to let people in. I do not like to open up to them and allow them to know what is going on and how I am feeling or why I am a certain way. Having this blog has allowed me to share my stories and let people in without having to talk about it. I am a very emotional person and it is always very hard for me to talk about things without having all this emotion follow.  The downside of being a Scorpio I guess.

Now, having said that just because I write about it does not mean I want to talk about it. I am not equipped to do that just yet.  One demon at a time right! I am thankful for my blog.  Having this outlet to put things out there and possibly making an impact one person makes it all worth it.

You can be very brave behind a computer screen, and in this case I am thankful

Favorite Online shop!

My favorite online shops are not that many as I am ALWAYS on money LOCKDOWN, especially these days!

I LOVE the Vintage Pearl. I have a necklace from here about 2 years ago for Mothers day. 

 

 Love this soul sister necklace!

 

This is like the one I got for mother's day.

 

This is what I want next.

 

Love this too! Morris code bracelet you can pick what you want it to say!

 I love that shop. Of course I love Etsy too!

 

 

Describe a moment...

Describe a distinct moment when my life took a turn...

Well for this I will just direct you to the post on Monday, September 2nd. I don't need to repost about it. I didn't know this would be a Blogtember post. I will add one thing however and say everyone and I mean EVERYONE should experience something like that once in their life. It would make people more peaceful and understanding I believe.  It also opens your eyes to what is important in life and have more of an appreciation of things.

Personality Test

Well, today’s blog challenge was to take this personality test and respond to my results.

First, let me start by explaining that whenever I take these types of things I seem to second guess myself sometimes. It is a torturous process.

So, I took this test and when I saw the results I have to say I was so surprised at the accuracy of the results. It’s like looking in the mirror and seeing the truth, and you want to say noooo that isn’t it but it is there right in front of you so it is. You kinda have to face who you are and come to certain realizations. I mean if you can deny certain things until you are blue in the face but eventually you have to look at the one common thing and that is you. So, as I continue to change and evolve as a person, which I understand now in my mid 30’s is a lifelong process.  

Without further ado here is some of my result. If you want to read it all click here.

ENFJs are the benevolent 'pedagogues' of humanity. They have tremendous charisma by which many are drawn into their nurturant tutelage and/or grand schemes. Many ENFJs have tremendous power to manipulate others with their phenomenal interpersonal skills and unique salesmanship. But it's usually not meant as manipulation -- ENFJs generally believe in their dreams, and see themselves as helpers and enablers, which they usually are.

ENFJs are global learners. They see the big picture. The ENFJs focus is expansive. Some can juggle an amazing number of responsibilities or projects simultaneously. Many ENFJs have tremendous entrepreneurial ability.

ENFJs are, by definition, Js, with whom we associate organization and decisiveness. But they don't resemble the SJs or even the NTJs in organization of the environment nor occasional recalcitrance. ENFJs are organized in the arena of interpersonal affairs. Their offices may or may not be cluttered, but their conclusions (reached through feelings) about people and motives are drawn much more quickly and are more resilient than those of their NFP counterparts.

ENFJs know and appreciate people. Like most NFs, (and Feelers in general), they are apt to neglect themselves and their own needs for the needs of others. They have thinner psychological boundaries than most, and are at risk for being hurt or even abused by less sensitive people. ENFJs often take on more of the burdens of others than they can bear.

Okay, in the first part I am indeed very outgoing and have always fancied myself to be great at interpersonal skills. Not to mention I am constantly dreaming!!!! Dreaming of the next big thing or starting something new and I ALWAYS believe I can do it. Time is what usually gets me on this. I always have the best intentions though. HONEST!

The other thing I found out is I am a giver, I knew that, I always have been and always will be.  The shitty thing about being a giver is you give and give and when you don’t get it back in return you instantly get hurt. It doesn’t help I am a super emotional person.

Overall, I truly feel that this personality test really had it right. It is so odd though to see what you are laid out in front of you.  HAPPY MONDAY!!!

A time that I was afraid...

A time that I was very afraid.

I honestly can’t think of a one time. I am afraid more often than I care to admit. I am afraid when my girls are not with me at home. I am afraid when we go somewhere and they are off by themselves.  Afraid of them growing up and leaving. Afraid that a boy will break their heart.  I am afraid when I am home alone. Don’t even get me started with being afraid something will happen to my husband and I will have to figure things out. I am afraid of my parents getting older. I think about what things will be like for my grandkids that I don’t even have yet. I’m afraid of a lot of things. I am sure technically it could be anxiety but bottom line I think too much about everything.

Useful Advice

This is pretty simple and there is not much to it. Here it goes…

FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT!

I cannot tell you how much I use this EVERYDAY!  If I wake up a little grumpy, fake it, plant a big smile on my face and sooner or later all good! At work and not really 100% sure I know what is going on, FAKE IT… contribute to the parts I know and sooner or later I’m making it! It is so VERSATILE! I swear by it. Never let a bad mood ruin a day, fake it till you make it. Never let your lack of understanding take away from your work, learn it but until then fake it till you make it.

Pretty profound huh! Happy Thursday!

3 Months Off

If I could take 3 months off I would actually work really hard at opening up a store. I have wanted to open a store/coffee shop where I could sell wonderful crafty things and meet all kinds of people. Chat and become known in the community. 

 

Then I would have my father come in and play his guitar for the patrons.

He's so cute!!

 

Then after I have things up and running I would sit back and marvel at it. That would be the most satisfying thing in the world for me, more so than traveling.  That could always come later!

Who Am I?

Day 1 of BLOGTEMBER

Describe where or what you come from. The people, the places, and/or the factors that make up who you are.

I come from a family that values hard work, honesty and being true to you. I had many great role models growing up from my parents, grandparents and cousins who really help mold me into the person I am today and I am forever grateful!  I learned that working hard pays off, never give up, hold true to your beliefs and treat everyone as you would want to be treated and much more. Watching my grandfather work every single day even the day after he was attacked and stabbed taught me determination and dedication. Seeing my father meditate and reflect taught me to reflect as well and look for the bigger picture in events that take place. Watching my mother and grandmother take care of their families and husbands taught me to stand by my man through thick and thin. Having my cousins around for most of my childhood and teen years, they taught me acceptance and compassion. They were always so accepting of everyone and me and my goofy self, I am so thankful for that.

So that is me. It took many years of fine tuning and understanding but I am very happy with the person I am at this moment in my life.

Well Hello Stranger!

My, My, My does time fly when you are having fun!

I have been away too long and I am very sorry! Summer just kind of took hold and didn’t let go. We just got back from a Labor Day camping trip.  The weather was perfect and the so was our timing.  This year has been a struggle for our family in so many ways. We were tested and faced trials and are rising above. If anything else the one lesson I learned this year is that happiness truly, truly does not have anything to do with money. All these years my husband and I worked our asses off to try and make it big in both his business and my career in early childhood. I started in child care because of my children but wanted to make it as a Director one day and have a center I would be responsible for. Making the more money and having the “title”. Boy I could not have been more wrong. Although I did love it and I cherish every child that touched my heart. It brought me more stress and time away from my family than I cared for.  So I made a change in my career and with that change took a chance.  I have always said, “I never want to look back and say I wonder.” I took a pay cut and in the beginning less hours.

My husband worked and worked on creating a business that we always wanted to be the next “big” thing for us. Run by family, having the kids learn it, have the business grow etc. We tried and we did grow and then things changed.  At the same time I switched jobs we lost major income from the business, basically shutting down one of the areas of the business.  Then this past summer as most of you know I was laid off.

Enter the MOST humbling experience ever in my life. We were hurting financially and because of that struggle I actually qualified to go to the food pantry in our county. We had to use it for a couple months.  The first time I went, it practically brought me to tears.  Literally, I walked in got my number with my registration paperwork in hand and sat down. I looked around me at the people who had it so much harder than we did and I had to excuse myself outside. I sent a text to my husband that said, “I feel so depressed sitting here!” I got myself together and went back in. From the time that I registered to the time I had all my food. I was not judged at all. I was treated with tender, caring hearts! I swear each of those people are angels! Angels that said “It is okay! We are here to help you at this time in your life.” To this day I am touched and I plan on helping out that pantry as soon as we are ready to.

I really debated on sharing this story and will not tell my husband I posted this.  I am not sure how he would feel about that. It is hard for the man who says “This is my responsibility. I have to fix this”, it is a blow to their ego/machismo.  At the same time, everyone has a story.  I just wanted to share to show that no matter what battles we face, remaining positive truly helps in overcoming the hurdle.  I know that sometimes circumstances like this can break a family. For us it has made our family stronger! This summer we survived and grew as a family! We learned how to do without certain things and pass on others. We spent a lot of time together. My spirit and soul are so full, honestly I am the happiest I have been ever! I just remember thinking “Yup, this is pretty shitty but, we are healthy, we have each other, it could be worse!” 

Now, I present to you pictures from our weekend! I think they sum up our story well!

 

 

 

 

 

I love my family!!!!!

Guess what? Blogtember starts TOMORROW. I'm BACK!!